Liz & Dick is a hot mess of a little TV-movie. In the opening seconds, a “based on a true story” message flashes across the screen. However, the story told here—the tumultuous relationship of Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton; largely focused on the 1960’s, in the years after they met on the set of 1963’s Cleopatra—was far more complex and passionate than Lifetime could ever hope to show. The story of Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton, if done seriously, is the kind of thing that would be more suited to a cable network like HBO. Instead, what we have here is a rather sophomoric production, in which the primary interest isn’t Liz & Dick, but whether Lindsay Lohan’s portrayal of Elizabeth Taylor would help breathe life into a career on life support.

Unfortunately for Lohan, her portrayal of Liz is simply abysmal.

There was a chance it could have worked. Lindsay Lohan certainly could have connected to Elizabeth Taylor in some significant ways. Like Lindsay, Taylor was a former child star who had a tumultuous private life as an adult, stalked by paparazzi. However, from the moment Lohan opens her mouth, she simply plays a version of herself, complete with her hoarse, flat voice and bratty disposition.

liz-and-dick-lifetimeI’ll concede that the various costumes and wigs are quite lovely. Lohan does a good job of evoking the fashion evolution of the legendary actress and activist. But then, it’s a lot easier to dress up like someone than to actually become them. Often it seems she does little more than roll her eyes and puff on an endless round of cigarettes.

Grant Bowler of True Blood plays Richard Burton. As is widely known, Taylor and Burton meet on the set of Cleopatra, and fall madly in love despite the fact that they are both married to other people—she to Eddie Fisher, he to an actress Sybil Williams. From there, Liz & Dick, written by Christopher Monger and directed by Lloyd Kramer, delivers a rather comical look at their relationship. The pair makes love, they drink, they fight, they make love, they drink some more, insult each other, he buys her a gargantuan piece of jewelry, and they make love. One has to believe there was more to their lives than this.

Bowler definitely gets the better lines in the script as Burton. He waxes on about how beautiful Taylor is, and how their love will last forever. Bowler is less miscast than Lohan, but he still doesn’t have the level fierceness and charm that Burton seemed to be able to dish out in equal measure. Most importantly for a story like this, Lohan and Bowler seem to have very little chemistry, so believing that they are the passionate Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton is a tough sell.

Liz & Dick is best reserved for the most curious Lindsay Lohan fans out there.

Presented in the 1.78:1 aspect ratio, this is a new television movie, so the DVD really looks as good as any standard definition product can.

The 5.1 Dolby Digital Soundtrack is surprisingly effective, mixing dialogue and atmospherics very well.

English SDH subtitles are included.

Interviews with Lindsay Lohan, Grant Bowler, Director Lloyd Kramer, Writer Christopher Monger, Executive Producer Larry A. Thompson and Costume Designer Salvador Pérez Jr. are available.